For the first of these journal samples, I’d originally planned to share the very first thing I’d written in a journal after discovering Mars One. However after writing “Waiting” (on how the drawn out Hi-SEAS selection started to impact my day-to-day thinking) I wanted to share something I journalled just a few days ago that then lead that post being written. A transcript of the journal entry is below:
Day 11, 427 (Monday 28/11/2016)
That headache really knocked you around last night, but at the same time you’ve clearerd it and gotten on with something a kin to your plan from last night. You definitely need to focus more on waking up earlier, and hence going to sleep earlir. Do you need to trakc your sleep? No, so you can break your reliance on your phone by moving it away from your bed. It would be a lot nicer to detach from tchnology and it’s instant answers by physically hiding your stuff. You don’t need to take your phone everywhere, you don’t need to read endless news, and you can prep your writing in this journal each morning.
You’re starting to redevelop an awareness of your body too – how you are sitting, sources of tension, and where your body is in space. Meditating on gratitude with a focus on your health & clarity of mind will assist greatly, as will switching your Sleep app for the meditation app so that you can meditate for 10 mins every morning as you wake, and 10 mins before you read & sleep.
Starting a more consistent sleep pattern will help too. Reducing screen time factors in, with zero screen time after dinner. You have so much in your head and 100’s of pages of paper to use – turn off the laptop and the TV and WRITE! If you don’t know what to write, read something and take notes. If you don’t feel like reading, grab a pencil and DRAW! You spend so much time waiting for something to happen, rather than embracing the environment you’re in & using it to experience & create. Waiting for an email from Hi-SEAS, waiting for a message from [REDACTED], waiting for Mars One – you spend so much energy focusing on the future you can’t control, instead of embracing the now. You’ve done it before – sign out of social media & only login when you have something to share. Use it the way you want to use it, not the way it wants to use you. The amount of time you spend looking at your phone – checking for a flashing notification or actually staring at the screen reading – is not healthy, and it’s clouding your sense of purpose. You are looking to create your own material because you have a lot to share, and you want to express yourself. But the more you interact with all the shaped content on the internet the easier it is for you to lose yourself in it – to drown out that little voice.
South Park has provided a lot of perspective though. For all our desire to connect with others, there is a deluge of voices and noise when we start to tap into the mass of humanity on the internet, and it can bring out the worst in people when they don’t empathise with the people they connect with. The same way road rage occurs because we don’t see the other person driving as a full person (just a car), someone writing something on the internet is just another username.
So venture out, but stay focused on your own writing & content production without straying from your own path. There are people you will meet who will help you on your way, but there are plenty more who will try to pull you from it. Disengage, outmanuvre, confuse and move forward.